Who Said Marriage Was Easy?
I can remember since I was a little girl wanting to be married. I actually believed in the Prince on the white horse for years in my young age. When would he come?
As I got older, I believed less and less in the Prince and was just ready for a man! Where art thou?! Seemed to be a familiar question in mind as I continually chose the wrong type of men. It took me years of finding myself to figure out what type of man I really wanted in my life. Just one to satisfy me sexually, financially, spiritually? Which one was more important? Before I actually figured out which type of man was more right for me, I figured out which ones were definitely wrong for me: married, attached, constant drinker, smoker (of anything!), unemployed; these men were definitely not for me.
Then something happened and I tapped into my spirit and to be honest I really did read Steve Harvey’s book and I guess a light that was slowly coming on finally brightened. I got my Prince.
But wait a minute! I tell my girlfriends often, “There are some things you didn’t warn me about being married”! It was a difficult task, and sometimes still is, to live with someone after living by yourself for so many years. I am no way a neat freak, but some things are just pet peeves! Why are the clothes on the floor instead of the laundry basket? Who keeps using my washcloth?! Dark clothes and light clothes do not wash well together. Why are we watching Matlock?
I am learning that some things you just have to “let it go”. Let it pass, unless you want to be known as the nagging wife who is always beating down her husband about something or anything. I choose not to be that wife, though some days it is NOT easy.
Sex drive. Can we talk about the sex drive difference? My husband is 16 years my senior. There is a difference in our drives. Yes, we talked about sex before marriage, but we did not part take in sex before marriage (I’m going to leave my opinion on that out) because like I said I had tuned into my spirit and read the book. What I can say about this now… please be honest with your partner, because sooner or later down the road it could be a difficult task to reconfront.
Early this year we were blessed to attend a conference at my church called Marriage Made EZ with Dr. Michael Freeman and his lovely wife, Dr. Dee Dee Freeman. This conference was fun and exciting and gave some new ideas to marriage. So if you can take anything away from this, remember: communication in marriage is number one. Don’t hold things in, because when they come out, it may not be the way you intended. Honestly is always the best policy, just find a way to not be hurtful to your mate. Get your finances in order so you can have a happy household and not a stressful one. If you find things are tight, there are truly 1000 ways to make extra money; you just have to seek them out.
Who said marriage was easy? I know it wasn’t me, but it is definitely what you make of it.